What He Thinks during the No Contact Rule: 15 Possibilities (2024)

FAQs

What goes through a guy's mind during no contact? ›

After things start to settle down, the male mind, during the no-contact phase, starts to look for your presence in his life. He slowly starts to miss you and your presence in his life. As time passes, his longing for you grows, and he feels deep pain and anguish inside himself!

After several days, he'll wonder what you're doing and why you're silent. It's common for most men to expect (or hope) that their ex will be the one to break the ice, and he'll worry when you haven't called or texted in a week. He'll be obsessed with trying to figure out what you're thinking.

The person who did the dumping usually feels strength (and often relief) at the very first, but with the days and weeks of no contact your ex likely begins to develop feelings of doubt in their decision, missing you, fear that you have moved on, and confusion that you have not chased, begged, and pleaded as most others ...

If you had an intense, serious relationship that lasted over 6 years, it might take him less than 8 weeks to miss you because you were such a big part of his life. If you had a casual relationship that only lasted a couple of months, he might hit you up a couple of months later, but it's more likely he'll just move on.

Speaking on the subject, Dr. Bhonsle says, “When the no-contact rule after the breakup is in force, a man might go through anger, humiliation, and fear, sometimes all at once. Depending on the time of day, the man could feel any of these individual emotions or all of them together.”

So out of sight, out of mind is it's very helpful to know that when you're in no contact, you're leaving your ex alone. You're allowing them to sit with the decision. You're allowing them to start to wonder if it's the right idea. They're not going to forget about you.

Yes, many men do experience regret after letting a good girl go. This regret often stems from hindsight and a deeper understanding of the value and uniqueness of the relationship they lost. Over time, as men reflect on past relationships, they may recognize qualities and moments that were special.

The no contact rule, in general, helps a guy understand how much he misses you. It piques his interest in returning. In a word, it communicates to a guy that you are unavailable anytime he needs you. The no-contact rule teaches men that they do not need a man to be happy since they can be happy on their own.

She will wonder if you're thinking about her or if you're taking time to reflect upon your role in the breakup. She will also wonder if you ever really loved her or are missing her. During this time, she'll have a deep sense of confusion as she tries to decide whether breaking up was right.

How do you know if someone is thinking about you in no contact? ›

Sudden Emotional Shifts

If you feel a sudden surge of emotions or unexplained mood changes without any apparent reason, it might be a sign from the universe someone is thinking about you. The shifts in energy fields can happen unexpectedly and may include emotions like joy, happiness, excitement, sadness, or anxiety.

Cutting off in-person and online contact is a sign that they're trying to make space for themselves by reducing opportunities to communicate. Moving away or starting a new lifestyle means they're making their best effort to move on, and you should, too, for your own sake.

Things You Should Know

Your ex might return if they unblock your number and keep an eye on you with social media. They may also try to contact you again. Once you're talking again, your ex might reminisce about the past, compliment you, ask to meet in person, or apologize for their mistakes.

1 For an amicable breakup: around 30 days. 2 For a long-term relationship: at least 60 days. 3 If things got ugly at the end: roughly 90 days.

In the context of what he thinks when you ignore him, the guy might experience feelings of confusion, rejection, and a heightened desire for your attention. He may question the stability of the relationship and his own self-worth.

The stages an ex goes through during no contact are relief, curiosity, concern, and contact. These are stages that an ex will usually go through while you are using the no contact rule.

So, a few weeks to two months is the answer to the question, “How long does it take for a guy to miss you?” Typically, men realize what they lost when they can't find a woman with their personality. By then, they learn not all women are the same, and they shouldn't have broken off the relationship.

If he hasn't heard from you, he might think you're pissed off at him. When a guy suddenly gets the silent treatment, he often suspects it's a punishment for something he did or didn't do. This is especially the case if his unanswered text was sent after a fight or disagreement.